Well, sch was pretty stressful and nerve wrecking for the past few days. HRM project confirm screwed up one FMGT as well thanks to SOME people == gosh i really hate them. Such a good for nothing bitch.. Did one-to-one presentation for the first time i was so darn scared! Felt my hands trembling and kept stumbling la omg... Common Test round 2 didnt make the week any better. CMA and ECD. Did what i could thou i wasnt fully prepared :/ meh. Just let me pass thanks!
Well what i can say is that i feel more.. neutral(?) On the inside. Yes im still caught up with feelings here and there, but it seems more proportionate. Didnt say its good but isnt as bad as before i guess :/ Learning to not get my hopes too high up, to not misunderstand the situation and to not see things too complicated ~ But some things are hard and almost impossible to change . No choice :(
I feel as thou im leading a aimless motivation-less life. Living for the sake of living only >< Nothing excites me to the point of making me feel like a 9yr old receiving a toy. Feelings and emotions left me ~ boooo !!! So empty now. So boring! Everyday just tennis, sch, show thats all. Mainly talking to tiger only but must keep my distance too. Not to overthink and confuse myself. Not to repeat my mistakes.
Gahh scumbag body and brain dont wanna let me sleep!! 2.15am liao lehh !! Rolling on bed for almost 2hr liao la :( gahhhhhh
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